“Within seconds my child came running home with blood streaming from her face.
I raced down to see what had happened and while one of the men stopped the other had his back to us and continued strimming.
My child ended up in hospital and had to have stitches due to the ignorance of these two men.
The men had protection and my child did not. It was just stupid to think that they had all the gear but the children on the park were in no danger.”

So what did happen? The child had blood on her face but did she fall over or did something from the strimmer hit her? It’s not specified. Also using insults like stupid is inadvisable, it’s best to stick to the facts. The account of the incident is dramatic but unclear and the letter ends with a threat rather than stating what the writer would like to happen, such as the employees being disciplined. This letter gives into the temptation to rant and rave. It is not clear and level headed and does not point out the facts.

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